And they say we have it easy
by moomin102
Summary: Emily Fields. The girl that lights up everyones day. Well she'll soon find out, it's hard to keep everyone happy when they all think you're amazing. Emily finds herself in some very tough situations as she descovers more that one person's hidden feelings.
1. Chapter 1

**This is basically my story of how Emily is far too loveable for her own good.**

**Unfortunately, I don't own anything from PLL.**

**Hopefully you'll enjoy.**

**XxXxX**

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><p>Emily turned into the student car park with her usual cheery expression and 3Oh!3 blaring out of the speakers.<p>

Every morning started the same for her lately.

She awoke to find a note from her mum saying she was out for whatever reason. This morning's was to tie up loose ends at work. Emily didn't care what she was doing as long as her own morning was free of the stress of her mother and their pending move.

After breakfast, she almost always got a phone call from Hanna. They had become very close during all the crazy events since Alison was found. They seemed inseparable at times. They turned to each other for any little predicament, the ones that weren't worth bothering the others with, like what they should wear and the like.

These early morning conversations just enhanced Emily's already amazing mood. She felt that nothing could go wrong. Even going to Texas.

She had decided not to panic about staying. She would look for a college to offer her a scholarship in or around Rosewood, but if it didn't happen she knew that her friends would still be the same towards her. She would visit often, as would they, and she would never stop looking for a way back to them.

Life was brilliant for her right now.

She parked and hopped out of the car, ready to meet with the three people whose company made her feel so lucky.

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><p>As Spencer collected the books for her first class, Aria fixed her hair in the mirror inside Spencer's locker door.<p>

"I'll pick Em and Hanna up on my way. So what time do you want us over?" Aria asked, her eyes still on her reflexion.

Spencer, done with the contents of her locker, closed the door causing Aria to pout a little.

"Well they leave for New York at around 5 so any time after that. And I'm counting on you to stop Hanna bringing so much alcohol," she smiled, "I cannot handle a full blown party tonight."

"Aww! You're no fun," she heard from behind her.

As the smirking blonde came into sight, the two brunettes chuckled.

Spencer shuck her head, amused. "You're such a bad influence, you know that?"

Hanna, doing her best badass grin, replied, "Well that may be but right now I'm a good girl who needs to be early to Chem. See you at lunch."

With a smile and a slight wave she started towards the science rooms, exchanging a quick hug with Emily who had just entered the building. She then disappeared around the corner, leaving a puzzled Emily with a furrowed brow.

Shaking off her friend's newfound eagerness for school, she continued her walk toward Spencer and Aria, with smiles and waves from all three girls.

As she drew nearer, her attention shifted to the red haired girl who called to her. "Em, hey," Paige beamed.

Emily's face lit up into that sweet, genuinely happy look that she wore so well.

Upon seeing this, Aria's jaw almost hit the floor. She nudged Spencer.

Spencer didn't respond. She just glared.

A few moments passed before they saw a shy blush tint Emily's cheeks as Paige talked, touching her on the arm. Though the conversation didn't reach their ears, the two spectators had a very good idea of the general topic of conversation.

_**No way**, _Spencer thought. _**No way in hell**._

After witnessing a couple of minutes of what seemed to be flirting that wasn't ready to stop anytime soon, and once she saw that Spencer was about ready to blow a fuse, Aria decided that it was in everyone's best interests to interrupt the pair.

"Em, hurry up," she shouted and waved her arms for Emily's attention, a friendly tone to her voice even though she was anything but pleased by this debacle.

Once the taller girl was reminded of her original destination, she exchanged a few more words with Paige, before they parted ways with a hug. Still smiling, happy in her own life for once, Emily arrived at her friend's locker.

"Hey guys," she beamed.

"What was that about?" Spencer asked through gritted teeth.

Emily, oblivious to the anger emitting from every pore of her friend, replied, "I know. Since when has she gone to class on time, never mind earl…?"

"Not Hanna! Paige!" Aria interrupted, showing her frustration finally. "What was that?"

Silence engulfed the group, Spencer still in a fury induced trance.

"Oh…" Emily eventually managed, suddenly finding the locker beside her very interesting, "…that. I… I guess we're ok now."

Spencer snapped out of her shocked state, but lost none of her anger. "Ok? O-fucking-K? She was practically on top of you at one point!"

Emily looked around, panicked, to see if anyone had heard. Luckily everyone seemed not to be paying them any attention.

"Spence, can we not discuss this now?" she lowered her voice.

Lowering her own, Spencer snapped back, "So you _are_ seeing her?"

Emily shuck her head, eyes full of hurt and worry because she'd caused her friend to be this mad. "It's not like that." Unable to omit the facts when talking to the people she cared for most, she continued, "Not anymore."

"What?" Aria shrieked.

Silence again. All eyes were on something other than their friends.

"Fucking hell, Em," were Spencer's emotionless last words before leaving in the direction of the parking lot, a painful presence dwelling where she had once stood, making its way into Emily's now heavy heart.

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><p>Spencer slammed the car door shut behind her and gripped the steering wheel, her knuckles white as she sat staring, processing.<p>

She sighed, releasing her hold and flopping her head down to rest there instead.

_**Get it together, Spence**._

With another deep sigh, she started the ignition.

School could wait.

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><p><strong>XxXxX <strong>

**So there's a start. This is going to be a long story by the way. Let me know if you like it.**


	2. Chapter 2

**XxXxX**

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><p>Emily sat doodling throughout the whole of her first lesson. The teacher had been babbling on about some amazingly dull thing for fifty minutes now and Emily had only heard around five words.<p>

She hated Economics. She was always away with the fairies during it, but this time she wasn't dancing through some of her favourite memories in her head, nor was she eagerly imagining the night ahead with her three best friends. She was stuck in a daze, surrounded by guilt, wondering why she had kept her 'relationship' with Paige from them when she had been the one who wanted no more secrets between them.

She remembered the look of shock and disgust on Aria's face. None of the girls liked Paige. With good reason. They didn't know the Paige that Emily knew. But if she had told them she couldn't help but think that Aria, at least, would try to understand.

Keeping the secret had clearly not gone down well with her. Emily knew her well enough to see that, even if it wasn't said.

The bell finally rang and Emily was the first to spring from her seat and out of the door.

_**English next**__,_ Emily thought, grimacing but also feeling slightly eager.

She had refused to think of Spencer since she left, deciding that it was only going to make her worry, but now she was about to see her, she couldn't wait to talk it out and make it okay. She couldn't bear the thought of them fighting. It just felt so…wrong.

She made her way to class, rehearsing some answers to the type of questions Spencer would ask.

_**Why, when you know she's psycho?**_

_**She's not. She was just scared to admit her feelings.**_

_**When did this happen? Before or after she tried to drown you?**_

_**Well…um… **_she sighed. She was screwed. She couldn't make her stubborn friend see, it was weird enough for Emily to understand the sudden change in Paige. _**Well I have to try.**_

She entered the almost empty room, scanning the few faces. _**She must be held up in her last class**_, she thought, taking her seat by the window.

Over the next five minutes the classroom became full of loud, obnoxious teens. Amongst the crowd, Aria slipper into the room, still sporting a face of stone that Emily concluded was her fault. She waved to the shorter girl but was only met by a cold glance before Aria took her seat a few tables away.

With what seemed to be her hundredth sigh of the morning, Emily laid her chin in her hands, watching, waiting.

The lesson began with still no sign of Spencer. There was a new teacher now that Fitz had left for Hollis, Mr Dobbs, and he had decided to babble on with and introductory speech and his expectations for the rest of the semester.

Girls were already eyeing the fresh face and Emily could see the appeal. He looked a little older than Mr Fitz, maybe 30, tall, dark and handsome with a bit of stubble and perfectly groomed hair. Emily chuckled inwardly, _**I wonder if Aria is regretting her choice of teacher**_.

The door opened, snapping her out of her amusing daydream of Aria confiding in them that she had kissed this guy in a bathroom as well.

Coffee in hand and immaculate makeup freshly applied, Hanna swayed into the room.

"Sorry I'm late Mr…" she looked at the board where the name had been quickly jotted, "Dobbs. I was held up."

"By the coffee machine?" his husky voice sounded irritated but his smile said otherwise.

With a grin and her head cocked slightly Hanna replied, "A girl needs to be alert for her favourite lesson."

Mr Dobbs let out a low chuckle and told Hanna not to make a habit of it. She had charmed him just like everyone else that she came into contact with, and Emily couldn't stop the shiver running down her spine as she watched Hanna smirk as she walked towards her seat.

"Hey Em," she said, taking the seat next to her friend. "Your sweater's in my locker. Remind me to get it at lunch."

"The green one? I've been looking for that for weeks."

Hanna smiled, "Well somehow it was between my sofa cushions. Have you been using my house as some sort of sleazy motel again?" she teased earning a playful shove from her friend.

Hanna loved to joke about Emily's many sexual conquests, calling her a player amongst other, less pleasant names. But she was well aware that it was all untrue. After the many girly chats that they'd had after Caleb left, it had become clear to Hanna that Emily hadn't slept with anyone, nor did she intend to unless it was perfect. That was very much Emily's way. She was a romantic and proud of it.

Hanna was proud too. She knew Emily had had chances to go all the way, but she stuck to her values. Hanna herself had waited until she thought she loved Caleb and, even though now she knew it wasn't quite love, she was still happy with herself.

The class settled into their work, Emily breaking odd every couple of minutes to check the clock and the door. The distance between them and Aria as well as the lack of conversation hadn't gone unnoticed by Hanna. Emily turned her attention to the door again.

"She's in the cafeteria, Em"

Emily snapped from her thoughts, her worried face softened into one of sadness. "She's ok, just lost in thought I think," Hanna said with a reassuring smile. She saw Emily relax a little.

Whatever had happened had everyone uptight, and Hanna was feeling a little out of the loop.

Concerned and irritated, Hanna decided to take charge. "What's going on Emily? Aria's got a face like a smacked arse, Spencer's spacing out. Calming down by the looks of it. And you look guilty as sin." Emily's head drooped. "Someone needs to start talking."

There was a long pause. "They're really mad, aren't they?" Emily managed, trying to find the right way to explain this whole thing. A nod was the only response the blonde gave. "I…I don't actually know why it's this bad," she started, inhaling sharply as she prepared to tell Hanna of her latest romance. "They found out I dated Paige."

Hanna looked confused. "Why would that cause all of this?"

Emily shrugged. She was so glad that Hanna didn't seem angry at her confession. "I think they're worried about me," she answered.

"Why?" The second the question left Hanna's lips it dawned on her that this wasn't just some random girl. "Paige McCullers!" she shouted. The whole class turned, including Aria who arched her eyebrow at Emily, as if saying 'See? It is wrong'.

Hanna quickly realised that this was information the rest of the school probably shouldn't know. Though she was still shocked, she reacted to the attention well, "How can she have beaten your swimming time?"

Mr Dobbs cleared his throat, successfully gaining Hanna's attention. "Miss Marin, is it?" she just nodded, feeling embarrassed for the first time in a long time. "Can you save your outbursts for a corridor catfight please? I could use the entertainment, just not in my lesson."

Hanna blushed and nodded.

Once all eyes had returned to where they were supposed to be, she lowered her voice to a whisper, "What the hell are you thinking! She's a loon! You're dating someone that tried to kill you! Are you mentally challenged!"

Emily smiled sadly at her desk, her idea of Hanna staying calm about it out the window. _**At least this is good practice for Spencer**_, she thought.

She looked Hanna in the eyes, "We were dating, Han. Not now. And it's not as black and white as you think." Hanna scoffed, so Emily decided to continue, "It's really not. She went a bit crazy because she was terrified of how she felt, but when she opened up she was so kind and we had some really great times together. She's complex, but she's a lovely person." Emily smiled fondly at the memory of their relationship. It was short lived, but it was still amazing.

Hanna's face had returned to its normal, caring expression. "Why'd it end if she's so lovely?"

Emily looked away, trying to hide the hurt in her eyes from her friend. "I didn't want to hide away, but apparently I wasn't worth coming out for. So I ended it."

Hanna hated the redhead. It was a strong dislike before, but no one hurt Emily and escaped her bodyguards. "I'll kill her."

"No, Han."

"I'll beat her to a bloody pulp."

"Han?" Emily sounded more desperate.

"I'll make sure no one can fall for that face again."

"Hanna!" Emily demanded to be heard. The blonde snapped out of her murderous thoughts to look at her friends glistening eyes. "I like her. As a friend. I'm passed the whole relationship thing now, it's just not nice to talk about. I guess I get a little angry about it still."

There was a pause.

"She's not ready to come out, and I wouldn't go back in. We're just on different pages, that's all. She doesn't deserve any trouble," Emily finished, one tear escaping as she felt for her ex and what she was going through.

_**Aw, Em. You don't deserve this either**_. Hanna reached out and hugged her, whispering, "Ok, honey. I'll try to understand."

She felt Emily smile weakly into her chest, "Thank you."

After a moment they parted so as not to draw attention to themselves and their conversation. "So…they're angry at you for getting with someone that they don't approve of?" Hanna asked, getting back to the original problem.

Emily shrugged. "I think that's part of it. Or maybe because I didn't tell you guys and they had to just find out." Emily let out a heavy sigh, "I just don't get it. I don't understand why Aria's ignoring me instead of having it out with me. And Spence is staying away. She never avoids a situation. But today she left school when I told her." Emily looked off out of the window, "I know I haven't been great but I think they're overreacting a bit."

Hanna gave a sad half-smile before turning away. She understood all too well why the two girls were annoyed, she was too, but she always tried to be there for Emily, no matter what she felt.

Hanna's thoughts drifted off to Spencer in the cafeteria. They all knew she was a hot head. She reacts first and thinks later when it comes to her friends.

_**So why is she talking alone time?**_

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><p>Spencer stared at the ripples in her coffee as she continued to stir the already cold drink. Her free hand was propping her head up as she watched the swirls dance. She'd lost track of how long she'd been sat there but it must have been a while.<p>

She had gone for a drive when she turned her back on Emily. There was this place by a waterfall that she'd been to a few times. It seemed like the perfect place for her at that moment, so that is where she found herself, sitting on a rock and dangling one foot in the river.

The flow of the water soothed her, but at the same time the ice cold sensation prevented her from shutting her thoughts down. It kept her alert. It kept her mind on what was important.

That really was the perfect place.

She decided to stay until she figured things out. And until she could be in school without tracking down a certain homophobic lesbian.

She arrived back in time for English but had chosen long before that she wouldn't go. It was Monday, so it was a double lesson and, even though her head was clearer than before, she wasn't ready for two hours with Emily just yet.

So she had sat with the same drink in front of her, barely moving.

_**What do I say to her?**_ Spencer asked herself, causing a mental conversation to break out.

_**Tell her you're sorry you overreacted. That you don't want her to make a huge mistake.**_

_**No! Don't apologise for looking out for her. Make sure she knows Paige is trouble.**_

_**Just what would that achieve?**_

_**It might stop her making a 'huge mistake'.**_

_**What does that even mean?**_

_**You know full well what that means, Spencer Hastings. This is Emily, you can't just let this slide by.**_

_**What if I just find out if everything's okay and, if Paige has upset her at all, I'll come to the rescue?**_

_**No, Spencer. If Paige upset her you'll hospitalise her. Step up to the plate, girl. Emily deserves the truth. And do you really want to wait around to see if Paige is done trying?**_

_**Hell no! She doesn't deserve a chance to get back in there.**_

A slight smile touched her lips as the feelings behind the thoughts hit her again and, although it hadn't quite made it to her eyes, that smile had been enough to get someone's attention.

"You're looking happier." Spencer lifted her head to see who had spoken. Hanna smiled and took a seat across from her glum friend. "I believe I just caught you smiling."

"Hey, Han," she gave another small smile back, feeling more sociable now. Her head wasn't clear and her problem wasn't solved, but she no longer worried about Paige McCullers. Her self-esteem was back and her calm, cool demeanour was returning.

"Have you cooled off?" Hanna asked, concern in her eyes.

The brunette sighed, "I think so. Only time will tell."

Hanna covered Spencer's hand with her own, "I know you're worried for her." _**You don't know the half of it, Hanna. **_"I am too. But she opened up to me. I think maybe she can handle herself where McCullers is concerned."

Spencer finally pushed her coffee to one side, taking her hand from Hanna's while doing so. "I hope you're right."

"Hey," Hanna smiled a real smile, "If I'm wrong, Em has three Rottweilers waiting to attack." She winked causing a chuckle to escape to brunette.

"Damn straight."

After a long, reasonably comfortable silence, Hanna piped up again, "They should be here soon. I caught Aria on the way out of English and forced them to talk to each other."

"Aria was that pissed?" Spencer was surprised.

"Well, from what I heard of the conversation, she feels a bit betrayed that Emily was sleeping with the enemy." Spencer physically winced at the words but Hanna didn't notice, "We all thought Paige was a bitch and Emily let us. Something to do with that."

"Right," Spencer said, sounding down again.

Spencer stiffened as soon as she caught sight of a timid Emily walking slowly towards her. She relaxed herself as best she could, determined to be the collected Spencer that people slain is very charming.

Emily stopped, facing Spencer and clutching her left arm with her right hand, as if trying to shield her body from her friend.

They just watched each other for a moment.

"H…hey," Emily eventually stuttered.

"Hey."

Awkward silence.

Emily shuffled her feet a little, no longer able to make eye contact. _**She looks fine now. Just sit and talk, Em**_, she thought, but her limbs didn't respond.

Hanna knew that she had to push this. She stood up and dragged Emily into the seat that she had just been occupying. "You two, talk! Stop being pansies." She gave them both a smile, "I'm gonna grab Aria and go out for lunch. See you later." Waving, she left quickly, wanting to leave her friends to settle their issues.

Emily couldn't seem to lift her eyes from the table. She was ashamed. Not ashamed of Paige, she had been happy to be with her for that time. But she was ashamed of the fact that she had hurt Spencer with her secret. Aria's disappointment in her did matter as well, but for some reason Emily couldn't stand Spencer feeling that way.

"Spence?" Emily finally got out, still looking down and with no real idea of what she was going to say.

Spencer's voice was quiet, but just as authoritative as ever, "Yes, Em?"

"I…" she tried to look at her but instantly dropped her head again. "I don't know what's going on." There was a pause. Spencer clasped her hands together, trying to hide her nerves.

"I didn't tell you because she wasn't ready to, not because I didn't trust you or want to tell you or…"

She was cut short by her friend, "I don't care that you didn't tell me all that much. I just don't trust her."

Emily looked up at this. She rested her hand on Spencer's, similar to how Hanna had earlier. It was a simple, friendly gesture. So why did it send the swimmer's mind cloudy.

_**Whoa. What? What was that?**_ Emily jerked back, a little too obviously bothered by the contact. Spencer noticed. How could she not? But she let it go, with the thought, _**Maybe she thinks that it will make me angry right now**_.

Emily cleared her throat. "Err…y…you don't have to worry Spence. We…we're over."

"I know, but for how long?"

"What do you mean?" Emily was really that oblivious.

Spencer closed her eyes and sighed, "She still wants you, Em. You must see that?"

"Yeah, but I'm not going back in the closet for her. We're through."

Spencer swallowed hard. She didn't want an answer but she had to ask, "Do you wish you weren't?"

_**Oh god, take it back! Please don't answer, Em**_.

Emily put her head in her hands. "Please don't ask me that, Spence."

_**Fuck. She's gonna get back with her**_. Spencer's head flung back and rested on the back of the cafeteria benches as she stared at the ceiling. She felt as though Mike Tyson had punched her in the chest a few hundred times and wasn't playing on stopping.

"I want you to be happy, Emily."

"Spencer?" Emily furrowed her brow, "What's wrong? This isn't how this conversation should be going."

Looking her dead in the eye, and with the same seriousness she had when talking about A or Ian, Spencer said, "Paige McCullers doesn't deserve you. It's that simple. Now, please, can we just let this drop?"

Emily was taken aback by the directness of the statement, but then again, this was Spencer. With a weak but genuine smile, Emily replied, "That'd be nice."

Nothing more was said on the matter and, though initially they endured awkward silences and small talk, after a while they were laughing and joking as normal, seemingly oblivious to their two friends returning from their lunchtime outing.

"So what's in store for tonight then?" Emily asked. Leaning closer, eager to hear what quiet night in they were going to end up ruining this time.

"The usual. Movies, take-out, a few drinks. Nothing too hectic."

Emily raised an eyebrow with a cocky grin, "if you say so, hun."

Hanna and Aria walked over after a few minutes of watching from afar and gauging how safe it was. They had decided that it definitely wasn't a war zone.

Hanna smiled wide, "all sorted?"

Both girls just looked at each other, studying their faces to see if it was truly over. Though Spencer had a heavy feeling in the pit of her stomach at the thought of Emily and Paige, she gave the girl a small nod and smile, causing her face to brighten.

Knowing that Spencer wanted her around was all Emily had wanted all morning.

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><p><strong>XxXxX<strong>


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